Big Blue meets Big Mac


From New Republic (August 23, 1993)

by Douglas Coupland

A quick comparison of two realities of the modern business world

IBM to eliminate 39,000 more jobs as part of a $9 billion downsizing maneuver billions and billions served
ex-CEOs crew chiefs
millions of white-collar workers callously tossed into the post-industrial labor pool older workers seen as a good source of flexible, uncomplaining labor
depressions common among laid-off employees Happy Meals
computer training seen as means of increasing one's re-employability french-fry computer both easy and fun to operate
expensive blue suits not conducive to watching daytime T.V. snappy, free uniforms
nostalgia for $100K per annum salary with perks minimum wage and free orange drink when the boss isn't looking
stress lines zits
clubby old boy-type atmosphere vanishes "Join the Family"
very few golden parachutes thousands of Golden Arches span the globe
headquarters won't return phone calls spiffy headset units just like the one Madonna wore in Truth or Dare
good chance to catch up on sleep breakfast service ends at 11:00 a.m. sharp
golden handshakes golden fries
grimace of superior delivering the bad news 'Grimace,' the lovable cartoon character--part of McDonaldland's colorful menagerie
smart downsizees have lawyers negotiate early retirement benefits free straws and paper napkins ungrudgingly supplied with every meal
a beer or two during the day helps kill the time McDonald's in Paris serves wine